Archive | July 2011

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Small Press

I submitted the twitter story on December 10. Today, the editor emails me. He’d like to print it tomorrow. Thus the email delivers the last present from Hawaii.

Paying in the End II

The great ivory wheels of Regence turn both slow and easy, every night and day, down by the river. My final bill for the wave-rolling ER adventure is now $558.92, compared to the originally billed $1349.82. Regence will pay none of this, but the discount is a relief. Being America, I had to pay $100 […]

Office Pool

My friend started an office pool on the outcome of my adventure. She assumed I would resent and be offended by the idea, but I found it hilarious. There is, of course, a free office pool website where bets are placed. She puts it this way: It’s a three-month adventure. He’s been there two weeks. […]

Stuck – repost

The completed “Stuck” has been reposted.

Stuck

Tuesday 7/19/11: Sunday afternoon I got stuck. Yesterday afternoon I was freed. More to come. I have to get the guys that rescued me some beer. Wednesday 7/20/11: Disappointing update: The guys got their beer on Tuesday. They continued to insist it was no problem, no need. It occurred to me taking them the gift […]

Billz

My latest Bank of America Visa statement has arrived. My biggest expense aside from rental cars has been putting gas in them. For an island 75 miles across, I’ve bought over $400 of it. All those poor Midwesterners who have to drive everywhere. My transit pass is in my wallet, ready to go home.

Unemployment II

The machine that was too busy to talk last week now provides clicks, pops, blown-out music, and a drawn silence that is its own punchline. The silence is broken by the psychobabble rumble of a call center and a woman comes on to ask how she can help me. Speaking with unemployment requires a certain […]

Lawn

Across from me, right now and all the time, the guy is mowing his lawn. There is never a day he is not pursuing this most suburban, American and fruitless of activities: walking around behind a machine that cuts off thousands of human feet a year to make the grass level. I hate lawns. I […]

Mau’umae Beach

The beach also features excellent swimming. From shore, it’s about an eighth mile out to where the cove ends–where the trees and rocks are. The bottom is smooth sand, ripped by waves, and is much farther down than I guess. Out at the end the swell is several feet, which frightens me at first. By […]

Mauna Loa

The top of the last mountain is six miles and two thousand feet away. At 13,679 feet, it’s not as high as Mauna Kea, but you can drive to the top of that one. The frequently hair-pinned, one-lane, disintegrating road ends at the Mona Loa Observatory. This is the famed weather station where the atmospheric […]